Lessons from tragedy

The Crisis Resource Center of Steele County offers unquestionably valuable services to those within the community, and during its 18th Annual Healing the Hearts of Our Children Luncheon on March 26 this fact was made apparent by Leigh Block, the guest speaker.
Block used her past tragedies to underscore the importance of organizations such as the Resource Center, which serves women and children and victims of abuse and domestic violence throughout the county.
While her story can be hard to listen to due its heartbreaking conclusion, Block was brave enough to share it with the audience.
It begins when she was young, and her parents would argue over money. Her mother, a victim of domestic violence, would divorce her father and remarry. She often argued with her new husband as well. “What happened in our home, stayed in our home,” Block explained.
After getting sober, Block’s stepfather became a much better man. In a way, she remembered him as a secondary father figure. Her mother would marry again later in life, and her father would come to stay with her and her own husband after getting ill in old age.
She first met her husband, John Tester, when she was in seventh grade, and the two had an on and off relationship for years. In 1998 their daughter Mikayla was born. The two got married, and that was when some of the trouble started.
“There were a lot of red flags back then,” Block recalled. Soon Tester became verbally and mentally abusive to her and her daughter. Two to three months after her daughter’s birth, she was afraid to leave her home with him, and rarely did. “She was like my right arm,” she said.
Tester would threaten her, and bought a gun which he claimed was in order to protect their family. “I was getting more and more scared because John’s threats to us were getting more and more frequent,” Block said. “I knew that if anything happened to Mikayla that I’d be devastated.”
The couple would end up getting separated and then divorced, and custody and child support became a matter of contention between the two parties. When Tester became unemployed in March of 2004, things began to further unravel.
Early that following September, Block received a phone call from Tester, who had visitation rights of their daughter. “My cellphone rang and it was John,” Block said while choking back tears. “He apologized and then he put Mikayla on the phone. She said she was in a car.”
After asking her daughter about her whereabouts, Block realized that something wasn’t right. “She told me that they were going on a journey,” she said. Block alerted the authorities, explaining the situation, but since there was no crime, there was very little that they could do.
The following morning, just after 4 a.m., she woke to the sound of her buzzer ringing. She went to look out her daughter’s window to see who it was and saw a police car. The police told her that John and Mikayla were in Wisconsin. “She’s dead, isn’t she?” It was all she could ask.
Tester had rented a car and drove from St. Paul to a rural part of Wisconsin where he pulled over and then fatally shot their 5-year old daughter Mikayla before turning the gun on himself. “Part of me died with her that day,” Block said.
“I was not some crazy ex-wife, I was a protective mother,” she explained. “That’s what you’re supposed to do is protect your kids.” Block’s story is now a cautionary tale for all those who share her struggles.
“Domestic violence can affect anyone, no matter of their socio-economic situation, race, background, or ethnicity,” she told the audience. “Please remember that this could be your daughter, or sister, or niece, or neighbor, or friend.”
For 14 years Block struggled to find a purpose in life following her daughter’s murder. “I am now the voice for those who are unable to speak for themselves,” she said of sharing her experiences. “I cannot express how important it is to listen to what kids have to say.”
“I do this so that I can save other children’s lives, because I could not save my own child’s life,” Block said at the end of her speech. For those in the audience, it was a tragic reminder of the presence of domestic abuse within society.
Since 1990, the Crisis Resource Center of Steele County has become a beacon of hope and salvation for those in similar situations as Block. This year they raised $25,000, including a $3,000 check from the Masonic Lodge of Owatonna. This total was well over their goal of $15,000.
Executive Director Sara Colby was grateful for all the support. “I want to thank all of you for allowing us to do this work,” she said. “We couldn’t do it without you.”